Dubai: What is intuitive eating and does it mean I can eat whatever I want?

There may not be a magic pill for weight loss, but what if you could take on a meal plan that would allow you to eat what you wanted to when you wanted to and still shed those pesky pounds? What the ‘diet’ does require, however, is trust — in yourself, in what your body is telling you  — some research (because you don’t want to tumble down the non-nourishing free-for all), and a willingness to forgive and be kind (to yourself). Would you be able to go down that path?

Logic and tonnes of self-experimentation have proved over time that crash and fad dieting — where you restrict meal times, portions, and sometimes eschew whole food groups — is a forward march into fitness taken through quick sand. The after-effects, which include low moods, a feeling of deprivation, and lashes of self-loathing when you fall down the slippery slope leading to cheat meals, all lead to a new — hopefully happier, certainly slimmer — you, if you can stick with it. That is, until you rediscover your favourite foods. And so, begins the cycle anew.

The notion of pushing aside ‘special diets’ has been around since the concept of a diet has, but come 1995, dietitians Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch coined a new term for a way of consumption called intuitive eating. The idea was to trust in yourself and in your body for cues to help you decide what to eat, when to eat, and — perhaps most importantly — how much to eat. The idea is gaining more and more traction as a legion of constantly half-hungry dieters begin to wonder what it would be like: freedom for your tastebuds and liberty for your appetite.

Bear in mind that this doesn’t mean that the world is an all-you-can-eat-buffet. It just calls for a more tempered approach to dining that satiates you enough to curb your indulgences. “I eat dessert every day,” says Dubai-based Emirati-Mexican proponent of intuitive eating, Maitha Al Owais. “It’s how I know my meal plans are sustainable.”

Food as reward or balm

The health coach, CEO and Founder of Maitha & Treats, explains that to chart this course, you first need to introspect. Ask yourself, what kind of an eater are you — sad, happy, bored, hungry? The pangs may feel familiar, but the underlying cause may not be. When in doubt, consider your options and the choices you are making.  “The choices you make and how often you make those choices offer up the clues,” she says, adding that you may need to contend with being a person who eats extra not as a way to quell your sorrow but as a way to reward yourself. “You could be an entitled eater, being like, ‘I got all my work done. I deserve to eat this’. That’s also a hook. But, normally, an eater will not be five different things,” she laughs.

Once you’ve reasoned out your motivations, you can move on to the next step: nourishing cravings.

It may sound counter intuitive to eat a treat when you are trying to shed kilos, but logic it out and it makes sense. “My whole philosophy is — healthy everyday treats. I look forward to my 3pm-4pm coffee or tea with a little dessert. My desserts are intentional with their size… because that’s really just half the battle, knowing that you can have that dessert. That way, you don’t feel that the urge [to binge] is going to be as intense come the weekend,” she explains, adding that while the 80:20 philosophy — eat well 80 per cent of the time and indulge 20 per cent of the time — can work, packing a large number of calories over a short period isn’t a good idea. “It gets tiring,” she says. It also puts more pressure on your organs to digest, convert into energy, and use. One bite-sized treat a day, however, hits the spot and is easier on the body.

Fighting conditioning

One concern that Maitha often runs into when coaching people on healthy eating habits is the addition of things like chocolate and full-fat foods. Years of conditioning, media banter, and confusing, contradictory food studies have resulted in uncertain beliefs about certain things. “The most common food fears revolve around, for example, eating carbs.  Or, having desserts,” says Maitha, adding that there is also a great deal of fear of fat. “I get people who fear fat because they think fat makes you fat. However, full fat is actually good unless there are certain heart diseases that you have.”

As for how she unspools the learning, she says: “I take them through this model where I call it, an unreasonable thought. So, say that someone’s like, ‘I just don’t eat carbs because they make me fat’,” she begins, explaining that using rationale, she leads them through a chain of questions that explores their previous experience with carbs. “I have them bring their own personal past experience to the table, because that’s going to be the most effective…  You don’t just fear something without any experience with it. You’ve had some sort of experience that might have been negative. You hold on to it because of that. I bring back that experience, and then I show them that  they are fearful not of the food group but that they will go back to a certain behaviour. But what was this behaviour based on?”

You don’t just fear something without any experience with it. You’ve had some sort of experience that might have been negative. You hold on to it because of that. I bring back that experience, and then I show them that they are fearful not of the food group but that they will go back to a certain behaviour. But what was this behaviour based on?" Slow introductions

She then gently nudges them to include some carbs in their diet, like, “half a sandwich for lunch”.  Seeing how this doesn’t put a dent in one’s progress breaks down their belief over time and allows for greater inclusion of carbs in a diet plan. “I would tell them, pick this portion. Do not go over. And I will say, it is hard at first and validate their feelings. I’m not going to give them a teeny tiny piece of the food that they’re fearing. It’s going to be at a point where it’s satisfying enough. Then, we go through this exercise of giving yourself permission to eat.”

She explains that she asks her clients to eat the ‘food-that-shall-not-be-named’ when they aren’t overly hungry,  “so they aren’t overeating it because they didn’t eat enough food”.

And then it’s time to make new associations, to taste that elusive flavour, to find joy in texture. “I get them to really hone in on that sensory experience,” she says.

Surprising results

The results are a mixed bag at first — some rediscover a treat while others who have abstained for a long period find themselves not so much in awe of the taste anymore. “It’s really like giving them a safe space to expose themselves to this food in a controlled manner. And the more they do it this way, the more they are building a new relationship with that food,” she explains.

When it comes to intuitive eating, forgiveness is a basic ingredient for success. Often, one might find themselves in a situation where peer (family or friends) pressure may result in a calorie-laden bite. That guilt of failing yourself can be crushing and bring about thoughts of ‘giving up’ (at least for the rest of the day). “Food in many of our cultures equals connection, equals the time we get together. There are two ways this comes up: some people struggle because they have that pressure to eat more than they want to, or the foods they don’t really want to eat. I find that the best way to navigate this is, if you want to eat the food, you should eat the food…when you’re socially eating, you tend to eat more because you get caught up with everything, and that’s okay.  If it’s an everyday thing, that’s when we need to pause and reflect, but once in a while? That’s ok — just ask yourself, ‘what is one thing that I can add that might create a bit more nourishment?’”

Making practical plans

Other practical ideas include, adding a favourite food/snack/treat into your meal plan for the week, so you feel not just full but satisfied by what you are eating. Try mindful eating — which means eating with intention and with a focus on your plate and what you are dining on. “I’m  a little hesitant in the way I use this word, but something what’s been helpful to me and what I suggest is, put on maybe one of your podcasts, or something you really enjoy on your phone. I want you to listen to a conversation and have your food. And, sometimes, time yourself and see if you can make the meal last a bit longer.

“If you’re someone who’s starting and wanting to understand your hunger and fullness, ask yourself, ‘on a scale of 10, how hungry am I?’, ‘does that make me feel good?’, ‘ does this make me hungry after one hour?’” Giving yourself these cues will help you decide on a healthier eating plan.

Is it easier to be fitter when you are single? Science, after all, proves that happy couples tend to put on weight as they find eating a familiar, comforting, and happy activity. “I’ve worked with women where one would say, ‘my husband and I binge together, we go on a strict diet together.’”

It’s a tricky tightrope to navigate, because you don’t want to push someone into change (it’s not sustainable), but sometimes being an example of transformation can have a positive impact on your partner. “When my client started to apply the things that we would learn, and she would also show her husband that, her husband slowly began to take the feedback on board.”

Detox plan

As for social media’s claim on your appetite, Maitha calls for a cleanse — from accounts and people who make you feel bad about yourself. “Look for accounts in tune with what resounds with you, that are more realistic in the way they deal with food, especially if you are sensitive, and you get affected by it.”

Using social media as a tool, she suggests, find healthy twists on your favourites.  “Often, people say, ‘I don’t/can’t cook’, but seeing easy recipes made from start to finish make them more accessible,” she remarks.

The hunt for that elusive fitness, the struggle for change and health doesn’t have to be quite as traumatic as diet-touters would have you believe, says Maitha. It’s about a paradigm shift — to see food for what it is, a means of nourishment, a way to treat yourself (in moderation), and a way to connect and bond with your community. It begins by deconstructing and reconstructing your relationship with food, practicing self-compassion and kindness if you slip up — “after all, you wouldn’t be so critical of anyone else’s choices, so why demonise yours?” — and more than anything else, being consistent in your choices.

“We all think that willpower is all that’s needed, but it is actually a limited resource. It will run out. But remember, your thoughts become your reality,” she says, adding: “Self-compassion is so important and it takes time… It’s okay to have days that don’t go well, just don’t give up on yourself.”